Alright. I’ve been going on for 8 episodes about my back story. This episode covers the basics of The 5-Star Approach. I hope you can make it worthwhile by committing yourself to utilize the method, and let me know how it goes. Email me at Tyler@5starapproach.com
S1E9: What is The 5-Star Approach
Tyler Small: What is the five-star approach? Many have been waiting to know
[00:00:06] I'm Tyler Small, and this is hacking emotional intelligence. So what does the name five-star approach mean? Where did it come from? I was thinking about this in terms of Amazon reviews one day while designing a program for a bunch of leaders.
[00:00:22] And I realized that we really needed a way to rate the relationship. We needed a way for people to give us information about the relationship that was in a very visible, concrete manner that we can visualize and understand. In very simple terms. And the five-star approach is all about identifying the quality of a relationship using the five star scale, just like you would rate on Yelp or Amazon or Google maps.
[00:00:51] And so it's this very visual numbers oriented approach to emotional intelligence, to building relationships at work and beyond so yeah, we are an emotional intelligence coaching company. Think leadership development at all levels.
[00:01:06] our mission is to catalyze 1 million five-star relationships. What makes us different. We help people measure and improve their relationships week by week. And I believe we're the only ones in the industry actually helping people to regularly. And when I say regularly, like on a weekly basis to measure their relationships in an actionable way.
[00:01:32] So we help people do that. We also help people get frequent feedback. And that's a pretty tricky thing for most people. So we help them introduce the idea. We teach them how to frame it in a way that doesn't sound scary and we help them ask, receive and apply the feedback.
[00:01:53] I should add to that. There's a lot of people who. Are just too overbearing or offensive. They don't have any trust with their organizations, with their coworkers their family members. And, that's really sad, but the truth is they need that feedback. More than anyone else, the ones who don't have it and can't get it.
[00:02:14] Those are the ones that we seek to help the most. We've figured out ways to help people break through those barriers. And we help them do that on a daily basis with structured activities, a very specific type of micro journaling that helps them rapidly improve their performance, their relationships, and And then our coaching, of course we have a strategic coaching model.
[00:02:36]But to put that into perspective business, people like to measure things. We measure revenue, we measure ROI cashflow. We want to keep the finger on the pulse, so to speak. You probably wouldn't go a whole month without looking at any of your financials, your sales numbers, operational projections, et cetera.
[00:02:55] You want to know where your cashflow is at and you want to know. Certain KPIs in your organization. And so in, in business we need to know either categorically or numerically, where do we stand? And so that we can know, okay where's our goal and where do we want to be at, how do we get there?
[00:03:14] And we've done just that in the squishy, ethereal world of leadership development and building relationships. So actually. Funny. I started out in my career just totally disgusted with the fluffiness of leadership development, somebody on a stage talking, maybe there's some discussion, maybe there's a short practice activity.
[00:03:39]But then they leave everybody on their own to go back and apply it. In their daily work. And I just feel that's wrong. I feel it's wrong to not support the implementation of the ideas. People learn from the relationships guru from the emotional intelligence guru. And I feel like as an industry, we've done a huge disservice to people by only providing information and discussion, not necessarily providing.
[00:04:08]The support in their daily lives in order to actually develop those skills. So the mission of my company is to provide that. , so another way to put it as you wouldn't drive passed a police officer without checking your speed, would you maybe some of you would
[00:04:25] and similarly, you shouldn't go six to 12 months without assessing your relationship. If you work with someone every day or every week, it's really important to get a more frequent feedback cycle going between you so that you can improve the way that you work, so that you can identify their expectations and respond to those expectations in a very responsive way.
[00:04:48] And I do admit some people have the ability to intuitively measure their relationships and are just extremely proficient at reading people.
[00:04:58] And they know exactly what to do to improve their relationships at work and beyond, and the rest of us need a little help. That is where we come in. Another thing that makes us different. Is that we use a different model to think about emotional intelligence social skills, many models assume that it's something inside the person that creates emotional intelligence.
[00:05:24]That it's a skill set that kind of resides within a human and our model assumes different. It assumes that emotional intelligence only matters in terms of your success in the relationship and that it's. Determined by the people on the other side of the relationship, I can think highly of the relationship.
[00:05:44] I can be satisfied. And of course, that my satisfaction ultimately is important. However, as we build relationships, we need to entirely focus on the other person's perspective. What they think their personal bias, their subjective, different, unique view of what's going on between us. And that's what we need to know and manage.
[00:06:10] That's what we need to measure and improve. We have a way of doing that and it's been extraordinarily successful. When I first started doing this program we had the counterparts of our participants in the program actually measure the relationship and we saw a 5% gain. We were hoping for a 10% gain, we saw 5% gain in the perceived relationship there. And we've been able to tweak that and we've been able to revolutionize the components of the program so that now we're seeing on the average, more like a 32% improvement in the perceived quality of the relationship from the perspective of the counterpart.
[00:07:00] So this isn't a self survey where we say, do you feel like you're a better leader now than you were. A week ago or a month ago? No, it's actually the individual asking certain specific questions to their counterparts to find out where they're at and what they need to do to improve their relationship.
[00:07:19] And so they're able to set a trajectory and get very specific information and feedback from that individual. We're doing this with people who, before didn't know how to ask for feedback. People didn't trust them to give the feedback. They didn't know how to apologize. They didn't have those skills and we're finding ways to help even the most challenged individuals to break through these barriers.
[00:07:43] It's really exciting to me because I feel like I, myself am a success story. I'm a product of the product. If you will. Anyway, I could go on about this all day and I often do, and you can learn more about the five-star approach by watching this show or checking out the free resource I've included in the description. I'm Tyler Small, and this is hacking emotional intelligence.